Winter Funnies 2017

18th December 2017

We hope everyone enjoyed the festive season! Here are some maths themed funnies that we think are better than anything you may have found in a cracker!

Q: What do you call a number that can’t keep still?
A: A roamin’ numeral.


Q: What did Al Gore play on his guitar?
A: An Algorithm 


With the Ark settled safely after the flood, Noah opens the doors and commands the animals, “Go forth and multiply!” All the animals depart the Ark, except for two snakes in the back. Noah proclaims again, “Go forth and multiply,” yet the snakes stay put. Perturbed, Noah finally asks them, “Why have you not followed my command?” The snakes flicker their tongues and answer, “We can’t multiply, Noah—we’re Adders.”

Q: Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?
A: He will stop at nothing to avoid them.

After a talking sheepdog gets all the sheep in the pen, he reports back to the farmer: “All 40 accounted for.”
“But I only have 36 sheep,” says the farmer. “I know,” says the sheepdog. “But I rounded them up.”


 The problem with math puns is that calculus jokes are all derivative, trigonometry jokes are too graphic, algebra jokes are usually formulaic, and arithmetic jokes are pretty basic. But I guess the occasional statistics joke is an outlier.